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Q: Who's more of a threat when dating a Chinese girl?
The other dudes who wan't to sleaze their way in by any means necessary or the Laoma and her preferred lined up dude?
With the ma giving the daughter so much pressure, how can you easily win if you're not the favourite? (Especially if you are a foreigner)
7 years 17 weeks ago in Relationships - Guangzhou
This is the easiest question ever. The mother. Or actually more to the fact, the girls inability to ever go against her mother
i do not worry about the family. if they give me trouble , i tell her goodbye. there are too many women in this world to suffer over one. for me the biggest threat are the countless ignorant nationalist nutjobs. i do not want to go to jail in this country.
In my case, it's always been the mother. Only one girl went against her mother, and I married her. I actually almost took off because of her mother, like I did with the last ones... but something kept telling me to wait for this one and be patient. Best decision ever.
EDIT: You'll never "easily" win unless the mother dies before giving your girlfriend her opinion. Period. If you really think the girl is worth it, you'll have to fight for her. My wife decided on her own to be with me, even if her parents said no. She stuck to that promise.
For me it was to overcome the objections of the mother first. However, it seemed hopeless until the grand mother took areal liking to me and then the rest of the family fell in line also. By now I am most liked by my wife's grandmother, her father and her brother; the mother is ok because she no longer can 'fight' everybody.
Still, there were some men in the neighborhood who always 'pushed my buttons' until one day I pushed back; then they were surprised and they left me alone. However, they kept on making 'bad comments' to my wife when she was walking alone - I also stopped that!
In the (Canadian) army, we had a simple rule - never pack more (weight) than you can carry. Same applies to relationships here. If you have too much competition, if you're not the #1 with all priviledges and rights that goes with the position...find someone else.
I would say Chinese woman is more of a threat when you date one~of all the problems or obstacles I've ever seen in such relationships, bottom line it all boils down to the girl's part. If she's strong enough, no one nor her family or friends can get into her mind and change what she thinks about your relationship. But if not, you need to well armed and be prepared for all kinds of ridiculous demands from her family.
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Hey Hulk, as of your edit, what would be the main reason of it? As I said in one of my posts I avoid at any price to have a girlfriend in China. So the trouble won't be for me but still i am interested to understand what's behind this fearing-your-girlfriend's mother issue.