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Q: why am I in such a bad mood today

I am still a newbie, love this site tho...... and have been so excited to be going home for the summer break, have 27 kilos of crap for my family lol suitcase packed.... and yet.... have been in a really bad mood today, , have really missed my family;  have 4 grown up children and 7 grandchildren, cant wait to see them.... and yet I went for bbq tonight with my friends and we were making plans for summer school and...... do you think that china for all its "bad china days" and I have had loads of them, in my short time that I have been here; gets into your heart and your soul, have had a crap day..... cant wait to see my family, yet cant wait to come back, do be honest, no rants about china please; just how did you feel at first

thanks

lizzy

 

5 years 46 weeks ago in  Family & Kids - Shanghai

 
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Posts: 6321

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What you are experiencing is perfectly normal. Yes, we do indeed have our BCD's, and there are things that we absolutely loathe about this place. BUT, there is also a lot that we love about being here, about the fairly privileged lifestyle we lead and or friends.  Just like our home towns, there are things that we love about our countries and there are things that we dont.

You are going home soon to see your family and that is fantastic. You are looking forward to that, but at the same time  you are already feeling homesick for China. There are things here that you are going to miss even for the short time that you will be back home.

Just see it as what it is: You have grown to love two places and when you are in one, you will miss the other. Neither place is perfect, but both have their charms.

Hope you have a wonderful  and safe trip!

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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Had them. Sometimes its just the isolation, which I usually don't mind. Some days I felt like I was too alone, no one to talk to, but maybe that was my fault I never looked for other foreigners to hang out with. My girl friend spoke English but not enough. I used google translator always. And I miss my pets, more than people.

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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GuilinRaf and TedDBayer are spot on. Some of us have nuclear meltdowns, or nuclear hulkdowns here. Some Bad China Days can be especially bad.

 

I think China brings out the worst in people sometimes... I know it's brought out my seething rage on more than one occasion, and I've never been one to get angry... yet I'm constantly in a bad mood here.

 

I recently sent my wife home to America while I waited here to responsibly try and fulfill my contractural duties (I did promise to find a replacement teacher), but I feel like I should've just did a midnight run and bailed instead. As soon as she got on the plane, I went from gentle to mental... Yesterday was one of the worst BCD's ever. I miss my family, my wife, everything and everyone.

 

Anyway, I'd say it's normal.

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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I usually get a nostalgic longing for China once I leave. It's a strange feeling that's hard to explain. I think it just means that this country has grown on you. Despite it being so different, you've conquered all the challenges that were thrown in your way and made it your home.

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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Maybe it is just that time of month? 

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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I agree with coffaholic to some degree 

I find I settle into a life and then change it back to before China in just a few flying hours 

There are things I will miss here when I get home next weekend but there is also a scene of relief that I can get back on with things at home 

 

I think this will be my last trip here for a few years  then again I said that last year and here I am no

Maybe I should try Europe next year?

Have a safe trip home Lizzy

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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Lizzy you sound about my age and I have 3 kids and 4 grandkids. I haven't been back home for 3 years and those grandies are growing up in my absence. I think also that at our age to have found a comfortable, fulfilling and challenging career when back home we might be on the scrap heap makes us fond of China for a no better reason than giving us a chance!

I have BCD's, these occur with more frequency each time a term is coming to an end. So, as one wag put it, maybe not the wrong time of the month, more like wrong time of the semester! I leave China every 6 months and travel to the Philippines, or Thailand or wherever I won't experience a BCD. But after 3 or 6 weeks away I look forward to getting back to my great apartment, computer, guitar and lifestyle and question my sanity at feeling like that.

Confession? I am going back to Australia in Feb 2014 and I'm bloody nervous about it.

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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When I left China, I couldn't have been happier. I had gotten so homesick that I thought home would be so great. Actually, it just felt weird at first. Then when I got past the reverse culture shock, I felt the way I did when I left America in the first place. So there I was, a half a year later, wanting to go back. As time goes on, there are things I miss about China, but I've changed my destination. This time I'll give Taiwan a try, maybe it will be a better fit for me. It will still have the Chinese language, Chinese food, and a lot of the same personality and character of China, but enough of a difference to make it new.  China really does become a part of you, especially if you make friends and like where you live. Here's to round 2.

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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Hi Shifu I am i the same boat ! Except I am married to a Chinese and have a 2 year old girl. I actually fled China after an argument with my husband, seriously homesick and wanting to raise my daughter in America. I came back her in December, at first I was so happy..Mcdonalds !!! taco bell !! then I started to see time pass, and some very selfish and cold qualities about western life. As more time passed, I felt in my deep heart a yearning to go back. Now, I am firmly resolved to go back and be happy again. I am depressed in America. i was happy in China and so busy complaining about small things (that seemed big at the time) I couldnt see it. So modern life does not mean a happy life, your not alone.

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5 years 46 weeks ago
 
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http://www.foxnews.com/auto/2018/08/07/dubai-tourist-racks-up-45000-in-speeding-tickets-in-4-hours.html

 

This is a bad day in Dubai,  33 speeding tickets in 4 hours. OUCH

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40 weeks 6 days ago
 
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