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Q: Why do you all like living in China and in the mean time having lots to complain?
Ahh... Another dead horse brought out of the closet.
I am here because this is where my family is. Simple. And I complain to blow off steam. Did the same thing in the US about Americans. It is human nature and a sound way to maintain mental health.
bennyfulltrack:
Does this mean that you don't have family, relatives where that you come from? Or you can't take your family with you? Agree that you complain to let of steam somehow, but is it not better to move on to better places then? I do understand that lots of us come here to having better opportunities and mean time still have problems to adjust themselves to the situations here, but how long can someone stand this?
Xpat.John:
I came here, because my wife is Chinese. We met & married in the US. After several years she missed her family & friends too much. Since I can work anywhere, I moved to China to make her happy. There are things I love & hate about China. There are things I love & hate about the US. It is all a matter of perspective. For me, I can tolerate the things I hate here, because my wife needs to be here and my children are here. For them, I learn to adapt.
bennyfulltrack:
Does mean adapting, complaining then for you. I'm not going to tell here that YOU are complaining, but seeing lots of answers on forums it seems that all foreigners always complaining. Why? We all have the choice to get the hell out of here. No? We all left our own home country behind, for sure we can leave here too if we want. For me, if I was complaining I would not stay here for one minute longer, not even 50 horses could stop me, but when I'm here i just adjust myself to the situations and it works out quite well so far. Of course many things i don't like and want to see in a different way here. But hey..., I'm a guest here and just make the best from it what I can.
Xpat.John:
Do you see how your argument of "If you complain, then leave" doesn't make sense? No place is perfect. It is human nature to complain about things we don't like, that is one of our best adapting mechanisms. But, if someone truly hates being here every single day, then yes, that person should leave and find someplace better. However, just because someone complains about something, doesn't mean they should leave. If that were true, I would have left my wife (and she would have left me) a million times over.
bennyfulltrack:
ok, i got your point and view. That's what it was all about after all. BTW you never complained here on this forum about your wife. Why not? This would be a good topic.
Xpat.John:
I don't complain about my wife publicly. I have too much respect and love for her to do that.
bennyfulltrack:
Ahhh............. that's interesting. But you can complain about your wife's country and other things publicly. Does this mean that you don't love it here and that you don't respect it here and that that is the reason to complain on forums? That you just accept everything here because of your wife? Just wondering how long this can last?
crimochina:
xpat i used to be a counselor, you can complain to me in private i promise not to use it against you ;)
Xpat.John:
Benny, your circular logic has once again come full circle. This is where I get off your merry-go-round. Have a good day.
Xpat.John:
Crimo, I am sure that you are the very epitome of confidentiality. However, I will pass on your generous offer. My complaints about my wife are for her ears alone. :)
Ahh... Another dead horse brought out of the closet.
I am here because this is where my family is. Simple. And I complain to blow off steam. Did the same thing in the US about Americans. It is human nature and a sound way to maintain mental health.
bennyfulltrack:
Does this mean that you don't have family, relatives where that you come from? Or you can't take your family with you? Agree that you complain to let of steam somehow, but is it not better to move on to better places then? I do understand that lots of us come here to having better opportunities and mean time still have problems to adjust themselves to the situations here, but how long can someone stand this?
Xpat.John:
I came here, because my wife is Chinese. We met & married in the US. After several years she missed her family & friends too much. Since I can work anywhere, I moved to China to make her happy. There are things I love & hate about China. There are things I love & hate about the US. It is all a matter of perspective. For me, I can tolerate the things I hate here, because my wife needs to be here and my children are here. For them, I learn to adapt.
bennyfulltrack:
Does mean adapting, complaining then for you. I'm not going to tell here that YOU are complaining, but seeing lots of answers on forums it seems that all foreigners always complaining. Why? We all have the choice to get the hell out of here. No? We all left our own home country behind, for sure we can leave here too if we want. For me, if I was complaining I would not stay here for one minute longer, not even 50 horses could stop me, but when I'm here i just adjust myself to the situations and it works out quite well so far. Of course many things i don't like and want to see in a different way here. But hey..., I'm a guest here and just make the best from it what I can.
Xpat.John:
Do you see how your argument of "If you complain, then leave" doesn't make sense? No place is perfect. It is human nature to complain about things we don't like, that is one of our best adapting mechanisms. But, if someone truly hates being here every single day, then yes, that person should leave and find someplace better. However, just because someone complains about something, doesn't mean they should leave. If that were true, I would have left my wife (and she would have left me) a million times over.
bennyfulltrack:
ok, i got your point and view. That's what it was all about after all. BTW you never complained here on this forum about your wife. Why not? This would be a good topic.
Xpat.John:
I don't complain about my wife publicly. I have too much respect and love for her to do that.
bennyfulltrack:
Ahhh............. that's interesting. But you can complain about your wife's country and other things publicly. Does this mean that you don't love it here and that you don't respect it here and that that is the reason to complain on forums? That you just accept everything here because of your wife? Just wondering how long this can last?
crimochina:
xpat i used to be a counselor, you can complain to me in private i promise not to use it against you ;)
Xpat.John:
Benny, your circular logic has once again come full circle. This is where I get off your merry-go-round. Have a good day.
Xpat.John:
Crimo, I am sure that you are the very epitome of confidentiality. However, I will pass on your generous offer. My complaints about my wife are for her ears alone. :)
again with this? its like the 10th time someone asks this.
bennyfulltrack:
Seems you can't answer a simple question and still want to say something. You are suffering from a ID(ten)T error.
rich45:
if you dont like forigners bitching you can always, you know, not come to this website. why do you come if your only gonna bitch about forigners bitching?
bennyfulltrack:
you just proved me right about you. Now go back to your pig farm.
I AGREE WITH YOU BENNY FULLTRACK!
A COUNTRY IS ONLY A PERFECT PARADISE, OR A DECREPIT HELLHOLE!
THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND!
bennyfulltrack:
With what are you agree? How can you be agree with a question. Of course their can be a middle way/ground. I'm taught that you don't look in a given horse mouth, though! This means we are all coming here in free will. right? Nobody told me that I have to come. It was my free choice to do so. So why complaining then? It is liking going to a restaurant and you don't like it. Why would you eat their in first place while having so many other choices? And if you still want to eat their, why complaining then? It's your free choice to do so. Isn't it?
DaBen:
Benny, so I'm not allowed to go eat somewhere, because I enjoy the steaks, and complain because the soup was cold or the salad wasn't very fresh?
bennyfulltrack:
For sure you are allowed to eat anywhere where you want. It is your own choice after all, isn't it? And you was their for the steaks, aren't you? Now that the soup was cold and the salad wasn't fresh, this you could eat in a other place, but after all you don't need to complain about this on forums, you need to complain about it at that place at that moment and if they don't want to satisfy you at that moment, that is their choice, for sure they will loose a client and you will NEVER go back. Do you see my point?
DaBen:
Wait, so if you have one bad experience out eating, you will never go back?
bennyfulltrack:
This depends on yourself, if you do it is your own choice no need to complain or whine about it. If i did, i would not complain to you about it.
I came here not by choice but because my company sent me here.
My first 2 months here were hell and I hated it, after this I slowly learned to like and even love some things. I cannot relate with people that talk about loving it here when they first come, and then become jaded later.
I am either loving it here, or in full on get me the hell out of this sh*thole mode. Not alot of in betweens for me (ok sometimes I am just content).
So yes, I do believe I have a right to complain sometimes.
bennyfulltrack:
Of course you came here by your own choice. Saying that it is your companies fault is odd. You could have rejected it. Couldn't you? For sure you can complain SOMETIMES, but not ALWAYS. When I see forums not only this one, only thing you see is that foreigners always are complaining about this and that. It just make no sense.
kchur:
Why not? Chinese always complain. Pretty much all you or I ever do on this site, Benny, is complain. Everyone complains. It's a wonderful bitchy life.
rich45:
kchur didnt mean to literaly read between the lines. you know this right?
Benny has a familiar tone.... without the off-the-wall caps and random ,,,,,,,,,,
Hasn't this question been asked at least once a week since the answers opened up?
Benny, let me ask you this... Why do you still come to this site if you feel there is too much complaining?
bennyfulltrack:
You are missing the point completely. I only have asked a question, if you can't answer it that's fine for me too. I didn't say that you MUST answer.
HugAPanda:
no, you are missing the point. This question has been asked over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over again.
HugAPanda:
Actually, I did.. and she said to tell you hi and to stop your whining.
bennyfulltrack:
No one forced you to read it. Plenty of other topics where you can enjoy yourself.
nevermind:
Cause when Benny asks the same question it more significant.
i vent on this website which really is not a good idea. their are many things to enjoy here and many good people here (just difficult to find them ) my experience thus far tells me that northerners are in general better than southerners. 1 month in hohhot i made a boat load of true friends . 4 months here nothing but liars and manipulators.
it's really about carving out your own "personally safe zone" cereal , pancakes 1 or 2 good friends, a pleasant work environment w/o arrogant foreign teachers , w/o a shAtload of paperwork and freedom to teach my students instead of "acting as a teacher"
i'm rambling again but the bottom line is i'm here to save up money to get a new start for myself which will take 5 years, i place a value on human life (all human life) to see people who dont value the lives of others gets on my nerves especially children. of course not everyone here de-values life but according to an "honest survey in foshan" 1/20 in a country with 1.6 bil. people that is still a sizeable amount i need to stop here because im gonna start venting again.but my angry is a combination or ridiculous work demands , arrogant co workers, a brain dead ex gf, and some stories i read on china smack along with some recent events. but i'll be ok once the semester is over
bennyfulltrack:
Crimo the point is if you don't like something, just pack your bags and go to a other place. Anywhere they bake bread. As you told you came here to make money for getting your life back on track and it would take 5y. So what then? Sit it out 5y don't complain about it, after all it is your choice to be their where you are. Isn't it? Perhaps it is because of bad choices in your past, but this isn't other fault either. Life is too short ..................
crimochina:
i'm not blind, i have a heart, my brain functions (sometimes), and i have a big mouth (all the time). it is never good to bottle up your feelings. look at it this way. if you are missing your assignments in practice the coach will either a. chew you out until you want to cry or want to punch him out or b. simply say nothing. B usually happens when he doesn't give a rats ass about you because he's going to cut you. i care about all people and for the time being this is my home and i care about my home. i want to see it do better
bennyfulltrack:
That is strange. You care about it you want to see it do better, but you complain about it.
crimochina:
do you watch football??? are you really american??? do coaches complain about their players performances??? yes!!! why??? because they want them to perform better!!! the only way you fix a problem is by first pointing it out, shining a light on it. admitting it exists. complaining about it. when i go to my favorite pizzeria in NJ , and they screw up they pizza. the next time i complain to them about it . you know why? this keeps them sharp, and me coming back . if they start to fall off from their standards i go to their competition. and trust me they appreciate me complaining to them first because they know that means im loyal to them.
bennyfulltrack:
I don't watch football and I'm not american, neither Chinese. And the coaches complain about their players because they KNOW that the players will read and hear it. this is different what you do because none of your bosses in school will read your complains. I didn't say that complaining is bad, you only have to do it to the right and destinated people. You just have explained it yourself with your NJ pizzeria. You are telling it THEM not OTHERS. right?
xinyuren:
No Benny, you got it wrong. Complaining, as it has been said, is human nature. In the right environment, it is actually healthy. This world is far from perfect. People get upset for various reasons and need to vent. This forum has turned into a place for foreigners to vent and gripe which is not bad in itself. As long as the words don't become venomous and hurtful, there really is nothing wrong with it. Here's my question: If you have such a problem with our complaining, why don't you leave this forum? No one is forcing you to stay.
bennyfulltrack:
I didn't say or wrote anywhere that i have problems with your or others complaining s. re-read the question. No reason for me to follow your advise and leave the forum, but no one told you to read my posts. I didn't forced you to do so........ I don't care either if you read them or if you are agree with them.
Everybody complains. Isn't that what you are doing Benny in an indirect manner? I'm in Canada and I have lots to complain about. It's freakin cold, I'm taxed to death. I think every Canadian complains about the weather. Is it cold enough for you?
crimochina:
you have free healthcare why are you complaining you have nothing to complain about try going to the doc in america ;)
thedude:
You are right. He is just complaining himself about complainers which smells a little ironic eh?
bennyfulltrack:
Ted you are right, everybody complains, including me. But i would do it directly to people who i want to complain about too not to others. that was the point after all. PS: i would like and love to pay millions of taxes this means i earn millions. You only can pay if you have something.
TedDBayer:
Health care not free any more , they charge us a tax for the 'free' benefit now , which is the same as paying for part of it. Less and less is covered, so I have to buy added health coverage, which just keeps shrinking. And it's still freaking cold out, can't wait for it to snow,,honey have you seen the car?
crimochina:
better than nothing stop complaining about universal healthcare ;)
Hey Benny love your comment about ALL foreigners complaining. Do you actually read the posts on here. I vent a bit, but hell I do the same about various people countries, governments, sports people, friends, referees, co-workers,managers on facebook, in emails, Australian basketball forums etc that I visit. It is expressing what you feel at the time but it is just doing it in a different medium to that which you would do when talking face to face. BUT ALSO people on here say many good and supportive things about China and it's people. It is like anything you will never be happy about all things but on the whole you still like or love those same things.
crimochina:
that's a good point we complain about our own home countries and each other and lets not forget the censoring cat
bennyfulltrack:
I do know that many people say good things too, but this was not the question.
woody:
"Why do you all like living in China and in the mean time having lots to complain?"
There you go Benny.
Just in case you forgot your question. Maybe you should check the dictionary for the meaning of ALL....
Why do people like bennyfulltrack spend time on Echinacities Answers and in the mean time has to complain about foreigners?
bennyfulltrack:
Why i spend time here, same as you. it's raining. just killing time. Is that what you want to hear? I didn't complain about any foreigner or Chinese. Not here, not on any forum. prove me wrong if you can? you are pathetic.
xinyuren:
Now, it seems you are the one crossing the line. I think you are Chinese. At any rate, there is no cause for calling anyone pathetic for asking a simple question (the same one you asked, by the way). There is the door to leave. Perhaps you should walk thru it.
bennyfulltrack:
xinyuren: You are free to think what you want, especially about me, no one including me will give a rats about it. Not even once i told you to be agree with me, i would care less.
I've never complained about this country. Just some of the things and people in it.
benny is a clown
bennyfulltrack:
Retardedness is prevalent worldwide, not only in China.
