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anonymous
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Q: Why does few foreign women marry Chinese?

I want to have a foreign girlfriend, is the only one.

8 years 1 week ago in  Relationships - Chengdu

 
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Posts: 373

Governor

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Most men are primitive and if they see a good body they can put up with the rest. Men are really quite tolerant. Women, on the other hand have more common sense and less patience to tolerate extreme cultural difference.

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8 years 1 week ago

Tired of dirt and lies.

 
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Most Chinese men are not taught to respect women. "Gentle" is not a word in their vocabulary. Foreign women have a much lower tolerance for disrespect than Chinese women (apparently). Also Chinese men are generally smaller than foreign men.

Also, I agree with GoldenBoy. They just have more common sense.

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8 years 1 week ago
 
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Foreign women have different tastes in men and many are suspicious of Chinese men who are looking specifically for a Western girlfriend. It does happen though. Much more often than you might think. If you're looking for a Westerner then you have to understand that you must also adapt to her culture and not expect her to bend over backwards for you all the time.

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8 years 1 week ago
 
Posts: 1318

Shifu

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Good luck with that, it's hard enough to even get your foot in the door with a western lady. The easiest methods for western guys to find Chinese girls won't work for you. It's extremely rare if she's going to approach you, so sitting back and being shy isn't going to work. But you can't just be blunt and walk up to her while she's enjoying a night out with her friends, she will pass you off as one of the hundreds of guys that bother her everyday. You're going to have to be creative and think outside the box to even get a conversation start. I'm not even going to touch all the problems you will have to overcome once a relationship begins to blossom.

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8 years 1 week ago
 
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Chinese girls have a reputation for being "easy" and will jump at the opportunity to date a foreign guy...even if he's twice her age. These old guys can't get anyone at home so they come to China and date girls that could be their daughters. There are definitely exceptions to this.

Foreign girls, on the other hand, think differently when it comes to dating. Cultural differences are a bigger deal and motives are usually not the same as with foreign men.

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8 years 1 week ago
 
Posts: 5600

Emperor

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anna you must be a western female, chinese girls have a reputation for being easy?????????? on what planet dont confuse chinese with thai or phil girls.
many women i have dated want what is not offered from chinese men, protection, sensitive and loving nature, pleasure. things that many women i know back home are taking for granted. those old guys you are referring to usually have a money and can easily find girls back home, but their preference is their own choice. adults are adults that is all that matters, when women date men that could be their sons are they given the same treatment as men who do the same?
my view is a simply one to each his/her own, what is between adults should be between those particular adults and not anyone else

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8 years 1 week ago
 
Posts: 68

Governor

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I think Chinese men often treat their girlfriends too well in some ways buying them things phoning them, helping them like you would a disabled child 'carry their bag' are women really so weak? I think it would be an insult to offer to carry a western womans handbag (when its small and almost weightless)
Chinese men often dont think of women in the same way, many chinese men ive met think women are incapable of doing things for themselves...simply not true, I tell my (chinese)girlfriend she needs to learn how to do things for herself, i think most western girls will know this already...

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8 years 1 week ago
 
Posts: 5600

Emperor

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treating your gf like a dumb weak 2 year old is not treating her well, it's called controlling .

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8 years 1 week ago
 
Posts: 1006

Shifu

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Yah... Good luck with that. So many reasons, western ladies don't dig guys digging in their nose (that behavior should stop no later than 5 years old), spitting, chain smoking, acting all uppity... Then we have genetics/biology (hotdog in a hallway anyone? Not saying all men here, but I've been to the pool, I've seen what most of the locals are packing! Wink Laughing out loud ), Then the money, in most cases here I would wager the western woman likely makes more if not as much as her male counter part (local man) so... yah. Then the cultural differences where the local mans family will weigh in (this would be the real nail in the coffin) the "bitch" they would affectionately refer to as "mother" wouldn't know what the f*ck hit her when she attempts to lay down the "law" with her new or future daughter in law, that would go over like a lead balloon! Imagine the foreign woman gives birth to a daughter and her Chinese in-laws voice their dissatisfaction and inform her she's going to have to have another child (boy) and she better get it right this time (boy)! Right.... The Chinese mother in law would have a broken nose or jaw at this point... Or His mother (Chinese) picks an argument with her (foreign woman, an argument of any topic) normally s Chinese daughter in law would simply let her mother in law win the argument or she would run off crying... Not a western woman, mama bitch would be either dead of heart failure or running off crying saying how she's disowning her son unless he divorces the western whore!!! I can go on all day but my fingers are tired now.... Sad

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8 years 1 week ago
 
Posts: 461

Governor

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Why does foreign women marry Chinese, well here are a few suggestions :

a) the guy rich, and the Western girl (usually pretty) is just a gold digger.
b) the Western girl is ugly, and couldn't find somebody else, the guy gets his foreign passport
c) the Western girl is overwhelmingly crazy about Chinese culture and people that she closes both eyes on ugliness

Did I miss any? Oh yes, love!!!! Smile Well, love is in the eyes of beholder!

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8 years 1 week ago
 
Posts: 650

Governor

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Because most foreigners(female, western) r strong in mental, and Chinese men either too soft(shanghainess) or too Machismo, they want the man treat them well, but respect them……
And they don't want to change themselves for anyone, they want to be their own. Quite different from Chinese girls.

Find urself a Korean or Japanese. Better gfs and wfs!

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8 years 1 week ago
 
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It's a combination of things.

First off, the "standards of beauty" are different. Not all, but a lot of Chinese men look "feminine" to western women, so it doesn't send them the right signal. Of course, this doesn't apply to all western women, but we can stereotype here.

Second, China still has traditional "expected roles" for a husband and wife. This is changing of course, but it can be difficult for a foreigner to deal with, especially a woman who is used to being emancipated and living in a society where (ideally) they are treated as equals and have the same rights and abilities to do whatever they feel like. Legally in China it is set up that there are equal rights between men and women, but there are clear distinctions when it deals with marriage and things like that due to customs and traditions that won't disappear overnight.

Third, I think that the western attitude might be a turnoff for Chinese men which is why Chinese man / Western woman relationships aren't as common. Again, this goes back to point #2 to an extent, but I do believe this is a bigger factor than most people realize. I don't think it's simply a matter of western women "not liking" Chinese men, I think the reverse is true as well. I'd be willing to bet money that most Chinese men if given the choice would take a moderately attractive Japanese woman as a wife over an American hottie, simply because they wouldn't want to deal with the BS.

Anyway, if you want to find a western girlfriend, it's not impossible. Your best bet would be college students here in China or to live in another country. Or try a personal ad on a site like this. A lot of foreigners check out sites like this and it never hurts to advertise.

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8 years 1 week ago
 
Posts: 2256

Emperor

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I'm a foreign girl, and I would like to date a Chinese guy. The problem is that it is difficult to meet any. I am shy, although I might not be considered as shy compared to Chinese girls, and so I can't just walk up to a cute guy and say hello. Also, I don't really speak any Chinese, so it is difficult to talk to anyone. My advice is that if you want to have a foreign girlfriend, know a decent amount of English, be a bit brave and talk to a foreign girl. If she likes you, she'll keep talking to you. There are many girls around the world who like Asian guys, but I think that many are still a bit traditional in that they want the guy to say hello first.

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8 years 1 week ago
 
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