The place to ask China-related questions!
Beijing Shanghai Guangzhou Shenzhen Chengdu Xi'an Hangzhou Qingdao Dalian Suzhou Nanjing More Cities>>

Categories

Close
Welcome to eChinacities Answers! Please or register if you wish to join conversations or ask questions relating to life in China. For help, click here.
X

Verify email

Your verification code has been sent to:

Didn`t receive your code? Resend code

By continuing you agree to eChinacities's Privacy Policy .

Sign up with Google Sign up with Facebook
Sign up with Email Already have an account? .
Posts: 2240

Shifu

0
1
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
1

Q: Why most Chinese does not understand privacy?

Why most Chinese does not understand an individual's relationship status is personal privacy and it is considered rude to keep asking about it?

They say it is called polite to ask, how ridiculous they are!

If you are annoyed and tell them to stop. They will just attack you.

While on the book and media, they keep saying

4 years 24 weeks ago in  General  - China

 
Highest Voted
Posts: 157

General

1
2
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
1

If you live in a village, this is par for the course.

Stiggs:

So is making up a story about people and then it becomes 'true'.

 

Not in a village, but in a new community I had just moved into....

 

I was walking past a gaggle of old ladies and they all stopped talking to stare at me as I went past and then they started asking each other questions about me. Where's he from etc etc. Turns out - according to them - I was American.

 

A few weeks later someone in the local market veggie market said hello... I heard you're from Meiguo...  and when I said nope, I'm from NZ...

 

but my friend said you're American

 

No, New Zealand.

 

But, everyone says you're American....

 

Nope, NZ.

 

I'm pretty sure in his mind he thought I was wrong cos, how could EVERYONE else be wrong.

 

I found out later according to local gossip I also have kids in NZ and I was looking for a Chinese wife. It's a weird feeling being the last person in the world to know about my own life situation.

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse

TPP:

lol, you are absolutely correct, in a village it doesn't matter what the facts are.

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse

Viki87:

Cause their IQ is not well trained. HA They look like people in my village, lack of proper logical thinking ability.

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
4 years 24 weeks ago
 
Answers (5)
Comments (12)
Posts: 62

Governor

1
2
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
1

Different cultures have different views on privacy -- different rules on a lot of things, actually. When in Rome... 

Report Abuse
4 years 24 weeks ago
 
Posts: 4495

Emperor

0
1
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
1

yeah, lack of privacy here is sooooo odd compared to the US....  personally I am private by nature and prefer the US (Western-world) model.

Stiggs:

I think it's mostly to do with the hive culture, there are no individuals here, everyone is part of the collective.

 

"There is no 'I' in team" and all that.

 

I sort of understand how that evolved but from what I've seen the reason for all the personal questions now are so they can gossip about, bully and ridicule people. Oh and if the person happens to be higher on the social ladder than them it's so they know whose arses to kiss and be subservient to.

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse

diverdude1:

Yeah,,, 'Hive Culture' really says it all.  Funny I was photographing bees the last few months and never thought of that expression.  

Example for lack of privacy:  (kinda gross though)  The way the guys carry-on with their conversations and bull-sh*t sessions in the latrine. Stinks to high heaven, and wouldn't that be the One place where u would want privacy?? Yet they are in their yelling and smoking and havin' a grand ol' time.   Must admit still freaks me out after years here...

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
4 years 24 weeks ago
 
Posts: 2240

Shifu

1
1
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
2

I understand culture difference. But it is not great they attack me after I refused to reveal my privacy

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
4 years 24 weeks ago
 
Posts: 157

General

1
2
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
1

If you live in a village, this is par for the course.

Stiggs:

So is making up a story about people and then it becomes 'true'.

 

Not in a village, but in a new community I had just moved into....

 

I was walking past a gaggle of old ladies and they all stopped talking to stare at me as I went past and then they started asking each other questions about me. Where's he from etc etc. Turns out - according to them - I was American.

 

A few weeks later someone in the local market veggie market said hello... I heard you're from Meiguo...  and when I said nope, I'm from NZ...

 

but my friend said you're American

 

No, New Zealand.

 

But, everyone says you're American....

 

Nope, NZ.

 

I'm pretty sure in his mind he thought I was wrong cos, how could EVERYONE else be wrong.

 

I found out later according to local gossip I also have kids in NZ and I was looking for a Chinese wife. It's a weird feeling being the last person in the world to know about my own life situation.

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse

TPP:

lol, you are absolutely correct, in a village it doesn't matter what the facts are.

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse

Viki87:

Cause their IQ is not well trained. HA They look like people in my village, lack of proper logical thinking ability.

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
4 years 24 weeks ago
 
Posts: 5321

Emperor

0
1
You must be a registered user to vote!
You must be a registered user to vote!
1

I never really had a problem with people asking irritating questions because that's just the culture but when I choose not to answer, or give an evasive answer obviously avoiding the question and people still persist... that's when I look for a way out of the conversation and plan on avoiding them whenever possible after that.

 

Learn to take a hint people !!

Viki87:

Most Chinese, especially the villager, are not smart enough to take a hint. They care so much about other's privacy, will keep trying till they get an answer, which is none of their business.

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse

Stiggs:

I don't think it's that they're stupid, it's just a culture thing.

 

Me me me... I want to know everything about that person's life so they should tell me. Even if the asker wasn't oblivious to how the other person is feeling which they most likely are, it wouldn't matter because... me me me. Not always obviously but often enough that it's something you can expect to be common place.

 

Thinking about how one's actions might affect others isn't really a Chinese thing.

 

Often I think the personal questions and comments are a form of passive aggression though. Any time I got that vibe from people I'd usually put a big smile on and get passive aggressive right back at them. If you get the feeling they're trying to be arseholes Viki,  be an arsehole right back at them. If they're just doing the only thing they know then don't hold it against them, it's not their fault.

 

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse

icnif77:

You just described big-ass OP ...

 

 Was it intentionally ... ?

4 years 24 weeks ago
Report Abuse

PulSartre:

Once at a time icniff you ought to give Vicky what is hers just as Stiggs did with his sound answer. You don't need to keep her in the corner of a presumed earned stigma, becuase she is well stigmatized on this site, however she has learned to ignore more than us Westerners the Echina naggings at her. C'mon you must give the respect this time. You're better than that. 

4 years 23 weeks ago
Report Abuse
4 years 23 weeks ago
Report Abuse

Viki87:

Most of them just doesn't know it is impolite to ask personal question. Just super annoying, asking me everyday, nonstop. Today the ladies kept telling me, you should find Chinese men. Don't think of marrying foreign man. Weird Villagers. I told them it is a personal preference, but they just do not stop pushing me to give up the idea of marrying a foreigner. Super weird and annoying, if I act mad at them, they will call me rude and the rumors will spread in the village talking bad about me and they all will start isolating me. I had enough bullshit in this village. It is their stupid culture but not mine. In big city like Shanghai, it gets better, people still ask about private question but if you give hint that you do not want to reveal, they usually stop. The government should give education lesson to tell them what is called privacy and people should respect that. Chinese school never had privacy education.

4 years 23 weeks ago
Report Abuse
Report Abuse
4 years 24 weeks ago
 
Know the answer ?
Please or register to post answer.

Report Abuse

Security Code: * Enter the text diplayed in the box below
Image CAPTCHA
Enter the characters shown in the image.
  • Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li> <dl> <dt> <dd> <img> <br> <p> <u>
  • Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically.
  • Lines and paragraphs break automatically.
  • Textual smileys will be replaced with graphical ones.

More information about formatting options

Forward Question

Answer of the DayMORE >>
A:  "... through ..."?  Only "through" comes to mind is "S
A: "... through ..."?  Only "through" comes to mind is "Shenzhen agent can connect you with an employer, who's authorized to hire waigouren ... and can sponsor Z visa." It's not like every 10th person you meet in Shenzhen's hood can sponsor work visa ...  The only way to change from student to labourer visa is just a regular way by: 1. Finding an employer, who'll apply for an Invitation letter; 2. Exit China and apply for Z visa in your home country's Chinese embassy; 3. Enter China in 30-days after Z visa was stamped into your travelling instrument ...As I am aware, you won't be able to switch to Working permit by remaining in China....,so make ready for a return to your home .... -- icnif77