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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: Would a word of concern be needed if your American bf got a bad cold?
In China, you'd be thought of loving and caring if you asked your gf/bf/friend "How are you feeling today" after they told you they got a bad cold or things like that. It's mandatory especially when you don't want to ruin a relationship or appear to be apathetic. I wonder if it's also true in American culture.
10 years 4 weeks ago in Relationships - China
In "American culture" there are all kinds of persons, from those that care and show concern, to those that do not give two huts about how you feel. If you are almost a stranger, then almost no one will ask you how do you feel. If you are a close relative or friend, then you will receive more questions inquiring on your health.
As for myself, I do have a pair of eyes, 20/20 vison, and a mind a bit behind my eyes that I normally use, with an IQ high enough to make that question "not really necessary" unless I have not seen you for a few days. And in a way, us "Americans" do tend to speak what it is on our minds a bit more openly than a few other nationalities.
flyingheart:
Thank you. Very insightful answer. By "American culture" I meant a larger share of what is GENERALLY thought and done among a particular group of people living in a particular place that bear classifiable traits, like the difference between "how are you doing" and "have you eaten" greetings.
Actually I have friends on both camps...I just want to know if remarks like one in my question would produce similar results and ideas in Western and Asian worlds Again I am talking on general terms here as I am well aware that some people have a psyche against anything they perceive as pity, strangely including those words of concern.
I am not sure if it is because you are Chinese or a girl, but I think you read into every detail of your relationship too much.
flyingheart:
An interesting notion. But did you know that every big thing in the universe or the universe itself is made up of tiny details? A tiny fault in the brake can lead to a serious car accident. A small change in your DNA will give scientists huge satisfaction at discovering a new species. The same logic can be applied to human emotions and relationships as well.
However, my thread is more like a cultural survey than a personal bewilderment. Sorry for the confusion,
In Australia, such a question would be normal.
If the person appears to be down with a bad cold, then it'd also be normal for the bf/gf to do something for them around the home - usually in the form of cooking. Also, it wouldn't be to far astray to ask if they needed anything done while they were sick - washing, some sort of chore, or whatever. (in that past, that'd mean posting letters, but with technology these days, you're hardly going to be expected to send messages on wechat or whatver ) Maybe go shopping (food) or pick up some medicines (OTC) on the way over.
However, we (well, I) don't like to be told to go and see a doctor or whatever! Most people are intelligent enough to know what sort of medical care is needed, so "you should see a doctor" is usually pointless - unless they've already decided to. In China, I find people's total 100% reliance on 'doctors' to be scary (so - don't suggest it!).
And, "You should take good care of yourself" is definitely not a phrase that should be used! "Get well soon" or similar is ok.