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Sign up with Google Sign up with FacebookQ: Is your Chinese-foreign marriage sucessful or end up in divorce?
9 years 33 weeks ago in Relationships - China
It depends what you marry for
I like to think it was or love (and the fact she told me too)
9 years and 2 kids later and still very happy ( well I am anyway)
Successful so far. But I've been divorced before, so, long term, who knows.
If I ever again find myself out on the street wailing for her forgiveness like that poor sucker who didn't hand over his salary, I promise you, I'll have a damn good look at it. Divorce, that is.
BHGAL:
I never divorced.. I am widowed ..... but I hear you, anybody tries to mess with me in a way that I do not approve....I will have no problem dealing with it in my own appropriate way..... does leavingt he country mean DIVORCE? .. if I go home, to Canada, where they did not believe in our marriage, even after I spent $40,000 trying to prove it ..what would Canada do? I got married in China.... do other countries recognize this marriage is my query. tough questions, go for it ... got an opinion?
BHGAL:
strange I answer a strawberry quiz... usually disregard them.. but I am sure that a glorious wedding with her would ultimately end in a just as glorious divorce. A simple test of compatibility should be done before the wedding dear. do you like me?
through sickness and health........... trials and tribulations ..... for good or for bad.
I suspect you, Strawberry could never honestly promise any of these.
A commitment to a life together is a pretty big thing.
royceH:
If you were married in China then you must have the red card that says you are married. It's legal everywhere. Translated into Canadian it surely becomes definitive proof of marriage.
Why the 40 grand?
BHGAL:
immigration lawyer,($30,000+ and numerous trips back and forth) after they denied her entry.... still paying the bill. Marriage of convenience they said... my wife is not educated enough to devise such a plan... we are a simple couple... it's CANADA that is devious.... no money, no entry. but then they invoke the "test of time", which I think we should have now passed, but I have lost my desire to live in Canada.
royceH:
Yes, I see. In your situation I'd be similarly pissed off. Fkn lawyers eh. Parasites, the lot of em!. Ok, not all.
Sounds like you and I are around the same vintage. And I'm simple too...my wife sure thinks so anyway.
Lets meet and share an ale or two one day.
Chhris:
40.000$ is like 2 years worth of your salary or 4 years worth of saving in China. How sad :o Why did you bother with such an expensive lawyer in the first place? There are so many forums now that could have offered you help for free. If you had done your research you would have found that all you needed to do is wait... the 5 years you mentioned... and then now you could use that 40.000$ to build up your family. What a waste....
if i end up divorced, it will probably be the inlaws that cause the problem, my patience does run very thin at times, i dont want to learn the language, if i had, i would have already cussed them enough to make sailors and truck drivers run out into the night screaming.
royceH:
Work out a way to put the inlaws out of the picture. Yes, I know....blahblahblah...China and all that. But you married her, not her effing family.
Good luck, cobber.
timjames:
I agree, my Chinese in-laws do not know when to shut up and mind their own business. They know I do not like them and they stay away from me.
It depends what you marry for
I like to think it was or love (and the fact she told me too)
9 years and 2 kids later and still very happy ( well I am anyway)
Beijing and shanghai have both high divorce rate. What are you smoking by the way? You cant even search in bing and claim that divorce is foreign thing. Another brainless person and i am not surprised!!
Altogether 20,225 local couples negotiated divorces from January to September in 2004, a 30 percent increase from the same period last year, according to the local civil affairs bureau.
Meanwhile, more than 11,000 local couples terminated their marriages in court. About 90,000 new couples tied the knot in the first nine months of the year, which means that on average for every three new couples saying their vows, one old couple will break up.
Source: http://www.china.org.cn/english/Life/115127.htm
Marriage, schmarriage. The divorce rate in mainland China has risen by almost 13 percent, the Ministry of Civil Affairs said, with nearly 3.5 million couples filing for divorce last year. This would be the eighth year in a row China has seen escalating divorce rates, according to previous studies.
The latest affirmation that lasting romance is but a Hallmark card gimmick was posted in the ministry's 2013 Social Service Bulletin on Tuesday. Of the 3.5 million couples who were handed legal documents to end their marriages, around 2.8 million applied for divorce in civil affairs departments while the remainder took their divorces to court, SCMP relays.
Sexologist Li Yinhe said that based on the number of couples who got married and divorced last year, the mainland’s marriage dissolution rate was as high as 27 per cent. It was only about 2 per cent in the 1970s and 14 per cent in the ’90s, she said.
The rate of divorce refers to the number of divorces occurring among the whole population, while the marriage dissolution rate refers to the number of divorces occuring among married people.
“Research shows that divorce rates rise with modernisation. What happened in China is a good example,” she said.
Li points out that China's divorce rate is still lower than a number other countries, including the US, where 50 percent of marriages end in a divorce.
She adds, however, that people living in rural areas are less likely to get a divorce because it's often seen as a scandal. So in other words, more people in China still want a divorce but choose to stay in a broken-down marriage out of social pressure (which is when this happens).
The same bulletin revealed that 13.5 million couples tied the knot last year. Here's to hoping they don't fall into the ministry's doomed list by this time next year.
http://shanghaiist.com/2014/06/19/chinas-divorce-rate-jumps-thirteen-per...
My guess is not many people who divorce will be browsing this site. So the ones here are still in a successful marriage with a Chinese person.
So, the answers are not a fair reflection of the state of affairs.
Strawberry66:
I have heard from an Italian that most Chinese and western marriage don't end up well.
"Chinese-foreign"? Ah, when a member of the Middle Kingdom contacts one of those strange creatures from the darkest regions of Waiguo.
4 years now and still going strong like first day.
Or was it my motorcycle.....
Nearly 2 and a half years of marriage now, and 2 children. Over 6 years of friendship.
I'd say we're pretty successful, but our marriage isn't without it's ups and downs. We do fight sometimes; it's the exception, though, and not the norm.
I am happy with my 2 kids and my wife .
we are nearing to the 8 th year now.
ask me when I am on my deathbed, I think I will be able to reflect then
Marriage is not the same as when our parents married, or our grand parents, they would stay together until the end, they truely loved one another.
Today, it seems any where in the world, its just a legal piece of paper or to reflect ones status, almost like a" business relationship marriage"..
In China for example a women will not marry a man if he doesnt own a house, or have a proper job.
After all, its all about making money, buy house f... of the husband, have kid, divorce the husband, the women keeps and lives in house with kid very happy..
Or maybe the wife stay in a foreign country with the kids, and house of course, and the hubby works and makes money in China, very funny, haha..
Just to not lose face through divorce, in the mean time the hubby has a 22 year girlfriend etc,
The China way, and the international way..
Be very careful in marrage with a chinese, or any women i say, and many more would say the same, after being taken to hell and back..
Its an out dated old age game marriage, bit like the house wife thing in China, which is laughable! and very un predictable..
The 7 year itch is never far from most people in this day and age, not like when our parents
married they didnt care if they had money, or were sleeping in the park eating grass,
but truely loved one another..
Hulk:
I agree with you 100%.
This is the "me" generation. They want everything now, and they want it to be all about them. I see my cousin's woman complaining about him every day on Facebook, and it's always "me, me, me, me." He goes out of his way to take good care of her and their kid, but his wife is such a stupid fucking selfish cunt.
It's not just China. It's America too, and almost the whole world in fact.
I don't think that marriage has something to do with nationality of both man and woman
The divorce or happy end is as possible as marriage with the person from your country
Don't fool yourself, just find the right one and try everything to make him/her happy