Rob, old mate....you're only as old as the woman you feel!

Actually I've gone 50.  No worries for me.  But going back home and getting a job...fat chance!  So I don't really know what to do.  At least in China I can do what I like.  

No I can't...because there's not really anything to do.  

So, the conundrum....

Should I stay or should I go now..... who sung that song?  Was it The Trogs?

I'm not stuck in China but I do need to carefully consider my exit strategy.

no wife & kids to worry about? just enjoy your freedom. If you've been here this long, your routine in China should be quite comfortable.

There is always Thailand, South Korea, Vietnam, Cambodia...  So no, you are not stuck in China.

I am just 28 but I am kind of stuck, because i jumped the career ladder so high in china, I would never get such a high paid job in my home country - that to say because there are not many high job openings for young people >x

Sorta, because of my wife but I can work from anywhere so I don't need to stay in China. We plan on leaving or at least some heavy traveling in the next few years. 

China is great place for a single guy or maybe a couple without a child but I think it is just too hectic for me if I end up having a kid. Age doesn't matter... I got along well with a 75 year old woman here because she was smart and sophisticated and with 20 year olds for the same reason. 

I dont think its your age so much as the amount of time you have been here. 12 years is a long ass time man! Especially to be away from non teaching working gigs back home. People that stay so long just dont have the skills to entice an employer to give a job with a salary thats enough to raise a family.

I mean you could start a day care?? Its not just China man its life. You couldnt be a history teacher for 12 years in Canada and then just decide you want to be an engineer. Even if you have the degrees. They would just hire a fresh grad.

People that are serious about going back one day need to start preparing now. Teachers here can save much more than the average job back home. So save your money. Enough for a car and nice first payment for a house. That will relieve ALOT of the pressures of salaries.

Why not think about and learn the skills needed to be able to get a job back home. For example you could try your hand at sourcing here. Just part time. Learn the skills needed to purchase from factories here. Find the places to locate particular items. Get the prices you need without getting robbed. Learn about customs duties and taxes with import/ export. Logistics. Very simple skills that you can learn super easily rob, especially here in Shenzhen. You have so many resources.

These skills that dont need a degree back home can be turned into a merchandiser/ buyer/ sourcing agent for comapnies back home. Every large retailer has a team of employees that deal with China and someone that has done it on the ground locally would have value back home. If you can speak Chinese all the better.

You might not get rich but it would be a salary you could live on and give you a start.

Just one example , im sure you can find alot more if you just sat down and thought about it. But the point is, start preparing now.

You re not stuck. You're never too old for anything. I know somebody who got their commercial pilot license at 50 and was offered a job flying over the scottish Highlands and Islands. If you want to go back and train, many employers find more mature candidates attractive. I know a few who have retrained in your age. Perhaps thought they are few in number you could find an esl job back home. If you convince yourself you are too old to do something you will be. But if you really want to go home you will find options. 

Personally i I don't see that China is such a bad gig

Rob, I hear you. I don't think it is a China phenomenon, but rather age.  I left my home country three years ago to work in the Pacific, and turned 50 there.  Also spent a lot of time in China and now on my way back there on a full time basis this time around. This is my last shot, I got a nice job in a not too bad place and will stay till I retire..

Going back to my home country is just not what I expected, it feels as if I am from a different planet and everyone else is just going about their own boring lives.  I just cannot relate to anyone anymore and life is so boring.  Besides, there are no job prospects there, my GF is in China, and I actually feel much more alive in China than in my home country, which is not home anymore. 

Its a tough one Rob..

What is your support network like back in NZ?

Now you have a family it makes things trickier, what is the immigration criteria for spouses in NZ?

Perhaps the big question is can you stay in China long term?

How much savings do you have? Could you afford to retire here when the big 60 hits?

Hopefully China will increase the retirement age as the working population decreases.

Can you carry on with Kindie into the future?

I know you're good at it and enjoy it.

Perhaps the answer could be to use any networks or contacts you've made over your time here to get into a business.

I remember you said that your wife is from a rural province (Guizhou?)..perhaps a move there could be an answer, you'll be more of a novelty and overheads are less, the wife may have family or guanxi that you could use to set up your own little child care centre.

It'll be hard work but it could be do-able.

You're not gonna rake it in as its a poorish area, but it could be worth a shot?

Or.....maybe get your wife some kindie experience in China and take that back to NZ, I understand that NZ has many mainlanders there now, try and have a Chinese child care/ tutoring business..

I'm sure you've asked yourself these questions, I know I have....so much so I left China.  I feel the call to come back, at my middle age that is very risky.

The old country is bloody expensive and the only jobs are dull low pay call centre ones if you're "lucky".

Buggered if I know what to do....

http://middlekingdomlife.com/guide/am-i-trapped-in-china.htm

http://middlekingdomlife.com/employment/returning-home-dirt-poor-t335.html

Agree tough one, also 48, in china 3+ years.  Now back in US to think about future, contribute to retirement, eventually will have to look after parents.  It will be tough initially, but things are quickly falling into place

Just turned 45. In the last 5.5 years of life in China, I've completed 1 master's degree, and the coursework component for another, with just the research/thesis component to go, with the idea of doing the doctorate once that's finished. If I do so (ie, I haven't niched myself into something better - or won lotto), then I'll be Dr. Sainthood within about 5 years (ie 50 years old). From there, I've got a LOT of options and doors opened (especially since I'm also an IELTS examiner).

So, I think it all depends on what you choose to do now... if you're thinking of house, car, family, retirement financing etc, you're really going to have to qualify in something - or find a niche market! (or let the wife do it)

Consider yourself lucky that you lived long enough to reach that age.

I don't expect to make it anywhere near that old.

 Teach yourself new skills. Got free time? Teach yourself the following languages:

C#, ASP.NET, HTML, CSS, JavaScript & jQuery, and SQL Server. Make a couple projects with them that work. You can then get paid 68-100k back in 'murica with those skills.

Then you can not be stuck there. Make yourself useful to your employees back home. I did this. I am now making nearly 200k per year.

I have been thinking about this situation and I am pretty young.
But it just stresses me out in the end and I should do something instead of contemplating it.

Like everyone said though, you always have time and options.  I'm going to start part-time study.

I am retired, 58 year old Canadian, a pensioner. FREEDOM 55, if you have heard of that slogan. Retired here, largely because I can afford it, and partially because I worry about my safety in other places. S/E Asia has always been on my radar and from here, in tropical Guangdong, I can get to most of S/E Asia at a reasonable cost. This is my HOME now. A long term resident without the cash or desire to live in a secure environment in Philippines or Thailand or Malaysia, Indonesia or wherever. I would not and do not want to live with a manicured lawn, so the dangers would increase in these countries.  A week or two at a time for these places, with a home base right here in lovely Zhanjiang, Guangdong, CHINA. My retirement city choice, I am very happy with. Hope to see a lot more of S/E Asia in the coming years. HOP SKIP and a JUMP  to a variety of ADVENTURES.

Finding a pretty much perfect wife here has certainly been  a BONUS!!!

YES, I AM STUCK HERE  and YES, I am OK  with that!!

double post

ok .. there is more ... the flipping RMB should go back a few years to 7:1 instead of 4.9

Rob, if you had the money and a job to go to in NZ would you prefer to go home, or stay in China?

The phrase that keeps popping up in my mind: Why should I go back to the U.S? Theres' nothing to do there. Asia allows us to do almost anything. I'm having too much fun to move back to the States.