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Posts: 9631

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Q: How to answer this question? (pregnancy)

I was just on the sideline to a conversation today. A mother in law asks her daughters husband, "Would you like a boy and a girl", the guy came with a long blurt and I lost interest at the time, but thinking about it.

 

Would a good Chinese husband answer that he wants a boy? I have recently had a friend tell me directly that he is hoping for a boy, and his parents too. I know the reasons for this, as the kid will become their meal ticket and boys are more likely to make it big in the society. 

If it was me, I'd go "I don't care, either is fine" would that make me stand out as an ignorant in this society ? 

10 years 30 weeks ago in  Family & Kids - China

 
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Posts: 86

Governor

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My answer for your last question is, No, not to me. Oh, I am Chinese.

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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
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I suspect any Chinese guy would wish for a boy.....  pressures from family if they still have that connection to "home" 

If it's me.... I want a girl ... already got my boy back home..

My wife has a daughter ....  very much under pressure to marry...  (23) ..still going to school and working to find a good husband ..... she's under pressure but knowledgeable enough to not hurry .......

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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
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I guess make them hear what they want to hear to avoid a lecture on how boys are better than girls in China or gossiping from the whole community, then just forget about it and get any kind of baby you want. When the baby arrives, love it unconditionally with no absurd pressure and ignore any remarks.

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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
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My BF has said if we had kids he'd want a girl rather than a boy. Love to see people's faces if that little gem came out... of course, once it comes I don't think anyone cares about anything except the baby's health.

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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
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i always tell the inlaws that i want a girl and they can have the useless boy to raise themselves, my impression of the two leg creatures they call males in china is not very good, in fact im not sure this will change, it seems to actually get worse, much to my astonishment.

Scandinavian:

it is actually a good point. I'd hate to have one of those noisy, foul brutes, although some proper parenting could prevent the worst parts of them. 

10 years 30 weeks ago
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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Due to a little loophole in the One Child Policy, I know a lot of folks who would love to have a girl....at least for their first child.  It seems in rural China, couples who have a girl can have a second child...I guess in hopes of producing a boy.  May or may not also  have to pay the "social compensation fee".

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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
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Shifu

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Honestly all the Chinese people I asked about gave me the same answer: doesn't matter.

Had a baby girl myself (private ultrasound stated to be a boy....) and I can't be happier.

It seems to me that girls naturally behave, boys don't, regardless the parenting style. We got the prove of it all around us.

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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
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In today's day and age you can also ask: Do you want a gay or lesbian?

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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
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I was hoping for a gaylesbian. 

 

And now for something completely different-

 

   "Girls Rule; Boys Drool!"

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10 years 30 weeks ago
 
Posts: 443

Shifu

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I often get asked this question by students. They all usually seemed surprised at my answer; "I don't mind as long as it's healthy".

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10 years 13 weeks ago
 
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My Chinese wife actually wanted a girl, and we were both a tiny bit disappointed when the echo showed a boy instead. Nevertheless he's made us both very happy: http://www.cdzmkm.cn/index.html
My family IS traditional, and from their viewpoint a boy is more expensive for us, as we're the family who must provide house, car and dowry for the future wife's family. The reasoning for wanting a girl from a traditional standpoint, is that in today's changing society, the girl doesn't completely leave her own parents behind anymore. So a girl's family will get a dowry, but now the family still sorta gets to keep her...

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10 years 13 weeks ago
 
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  My wife wanted a girl the first time round and wants a girl next time round. I only want boys, they're enough worry as it is. 

Scandinavian:

you're outnumbered. poor fella. 

10 years 13 weeks ago
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10 years 13 weeks ago
 
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