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Q: How to handle long distance relationship?

Me and my BF need to live in different countries for a year because of I doing my master.

What is the best way to handle a long distance relationship?

I love him so much.I don't want to  lose him.

and one can give some advices?

thanks .

8 years 28 weeks ago in  Relationships - Other cities

 
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Try to see each other during the year. Long distance is difficult, one of you will be tempted to stray or meet someone new.

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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NOTHING is more important than being with the one you LOVE .....   not school, not money, not anything....    I was 2 years apart from my wife and I would not ever do that again... live and learn .....

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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If you are doing a one year master, this would mean either you are doing a MBA or you are going to the British Post Secondary Education System where a masters is one year, "or here in China", anyway, come home for winter and get used to skype of other forms of digital communication.

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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TedDBayer is spot on...

 

Long distant relationships generally only work when the long distance is temporary, and not for long. My advice is to prepare to break up with him just in case. You do not want to lose focus on your master's degree if you break up with him.

 

Your education is a lot more important than a man. I'm not kidding. If he doesn't love you enough to be faithful to you, and to stay with you through these times, you're better off without him. I'm not saying you'll break up, I'm just saying you should be prepared for anything. 

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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Trust, skype and as many visits as you can manage...

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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Techezee, some masters in Australia can be done in one year, I'm sure there are many circumstances that could involve a one-year separation and that don't necessarily mean then UK or China. I don't think you can make too many assumptions based on what she's told us.

 

 

But, regular visits are very important indeed. 

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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Well my girl is in the Philippines and we chat almost every day - skype or YM and she has QQ now. I'm pretty busy as well but you have to make time.....every day regardless. I visit her every semester change so that's 6 monthly. I am still trying to get her into China but that will have to wait. My other option is move to the Philippines...preferred option. We have been together for 18 months now and believe me it's hard at times. Getting immersed in your work actually helps keep the mind occupied.

Communication......that's it!

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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Try phone sex.

Call me, I'll give you some pointers.

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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Miss A, I was under the assumption that New Zealand and Australia where underneath the same Post Secondary Education System, didn't mean to mix the countries but most of the former British Colonies do 3 years Bachelor one year Masters, this excludes Canada who uses or has the same American Post Secondary Education, correct me if I am wrong for sure, but I think I'm correct. Ted, to funny, maybe skype with video would be better, you can get the full effect that way

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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my experience...it stops working after a while...

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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Grrr, I just wrote out a long explanation, and the tablet ate it. The short version is: no.

 

About half of our courses are three years, the rest are four, or five for medicine or law. Some masters are one year, but a large percentage are two or three. Very few Aussies do honour years compared to the UK, but then our courses are much more vocational and involve hefty internships as a matter of course.

 

I didn't have to do a dissertation, which was sweet, as I was drowning in internships as well as landing an actual relevent job in my final year - this would have been unheard of on all counts for my BF and his friends at uni.

 

There are some similarities, but they're not the same.

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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If it is one  year, I do not see too much of a problem, but only if there is trust and commitment.   A slightly older age also helps (for example, 28 as opposed to 18).

However, more than that could be a problem.

In Spanish we have a saying: "Amor de lejos, amor de pendejos" (long distance love is for fools).  The more modern version would be "Amor de lejos, felices los cuatro" (long distance relationships make for four happy people, this would seem to echo Teddys warning about being easier to stray.)

Like they say above, communication, trust, and mutual commitment are vital for this to work.

Good luck to you and all my best!

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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it also depends how long you have been together: therefore the level of trust is greater.

long distance relationships are difficult at the best of times, but if they are also cross-cultural, there are added pressures.

best of luck with it !

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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take a break, date around in your new city and let him date around. after the year is up, and you 2 still have that fire burning for each other, then go for it. 

 

why torture yourselves

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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I dont want to be a negative old prick, but long distance love is a joke, the Chinese think they are good with it, but are not, no one is. Never mind just City to City around China, "they do it‘。。 on an international level, its crazy, ive seen it before. The husband, or boy friend normally has another girlfriend, while the women, god knows what shes up to?

 

Forget this sh*t, just move on with your life, realation ships dont work long term, or even short term in another city or country! 

 

 

 

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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Funny coincidence, I got out of a long distance relationship a few months ago.

I had to leave Chine for my License, but we (and by that I mean "she") decided to stay together since we had already been going out for 3 years, and it kind of worked for almost a year, but I ended up breaking up with her.

They key factor: I stopped loving her after about a year together, but the whole breaking up thing is so complicated, sad and annoying, I basically dragged it on for almost 3 years after that. I'm that lazy (and "nice"). 

In other words, if he truly loves you, you won't have to worry. You've got phones and skype and all that shit nowadays, being apart has never been easier. And as Ted said, see each other when you get the chance.

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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All depends on how the relationship is NOW - not then. Then doesn't matter too much if now has no real future.

 

I read how you feel.... doesn't mean he feels the same way.

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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you guys are right .Long distance relationship is bullshit.I just find out he is seeing other woman and not answering my phone.Funny ! 5 hours ago ,he even asked me to trust him.HAHA.

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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you guys are right .Long distance relationship is bullshit.I just find out he is seeing other woman and not answering my phone.Funny ! 5 hours ago ,he even asked me to trust him.HAHA.

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8 years 28 weeks ago
 
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