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Q: What do you do when people say, "you are fat!"?
As an American, calling someone fat is the worst insult you can say to someone. I guess it is not that big of a deal in China, but why has no Chinese person seemed to have learned you should never say this to a western person. One time I told a student you should never call someone this, EVER. And he replied, "Well what can we say to express this idea?" I wanted to pull all my hair out. But then I would be told I was bald and fat all the time I am sure.
When some students meet me for the first time, they say "you're (insert adjective of your choice here)" For some Chinese people a comment like "you're fat" might just be their version of a conversation opener as they can't think of anything else to say. I just ignore the comment.
da pigu ni, would be my come back, meaning, Im going to kick your a**, if you are a little overweight, they call you fat, if you are way over weight, they call you strong. Jayknox, sounds like you are new to China, you have some good words but keep in mind, some traditions should be changed especially considering they actually carry it with them when they travel abroad. Imagine if this same kid took a trip to America and decided to say this, you get the drift.
My return answer would be... "I can lose weight, but you will always be Chinese"
I am not fat, but if I would be called 'fat', I would never took it as an insult. Chinese don't know real meaning of that sentence. Most likely, they only know the difference between words 'skinny' and 'fat'.
I explain 'insult' thingy to my students, and suggest one should use word 'heavy' instead 'fat', when describing somebody.
icnif77:
He's your brother from another mother? You should tell me that earlier!
Brother on the 'heavy' side!
Red_Fox:
@Kaiwen: I effin HATE that song. Now it's running through my head and I can't stop it! Thanks, buddy. Not.
frankbenedix:
How is heavy any different then fat? It is the same thing, same meaning.
Simple... Grow thick skin.
Kaiwen:
There's the answer: "I am not fat, I just have exceptionally thick skin".
Sounds like - as an American - you are on a mission to educate over a billion Chinese people about "worst" insults that Americans simply cannot tolerate. Oh dear. What a crisis. My advice to you? Retort!
When a local has the audacity and insensitivity to say to you that you are fat (How much DO you weigh, btw? You did not reveal your dirty little secret... Aw, never mind.), just say:
"Yu dum gai". That's pinyen for "dickhead".
And frankly, Frank... I can think of far worse insults than "You are fat!" or "dickhead". Can't you? (Please don't direct them in my direction. I am very sensitive!)
Amonk:
My dickhead is sensitive, too. I just hope I didn't cock up your joke.
Red_Fox:
@Amonk: Not at all. Good one! You should have been a sensitivity counselor for expat "yanks"! 
frankbenedix:
"sounds like an American" says the guy with Red Fox as his avatar.... WTF?
Red_Fox:
@frank: You need to put on your spectacles, son, and re-read my comment. I said, "Sounds like - as an American - you are on... blah blah blah." I.e. I'm an American just like you. Specs, laddie.
Red_Fox:
@frank; No worries, bro. I saw the ambiguity of my comment the moment you took umbrage to it. Sorry, man. Hope all is cool where you are! - RF
As my Father would say (and I now say to my kids), "This isn't fat! This is table muscle. It comes from pulling myself up to the table and from pushing myself away from the table."
Tell them you're a general.. they'll understand a big belly is in the job description.
AS a non-American , i have often wondered- so , it s not okay to call somebody "fat " even when they are, but it is okay to call smarter people names , offensive most of the time?care to explain?
frankbenedix:
Call smart people names? I think calling someone smart is a complement. I did not know people do not value intelligence. I think if what ever culture you are does not value intelligence, it is a sad day for you and your culture.
instant_noodles:
Dude, it 's not my culture that makes fun of people who are not completely brainless , by calling them "nerds" and ostracizing them! It's not my culture that worships breast implants , or botox , and every other person goes for a plastic surgery??? because the worst thing is being called "fat" ??? don't talk about my culture, cuz , first off, u don't know ANYTHING about it, and then-at least i have one....
When some students meet me for the first time, they say "you're (insert adjective of your choice here)" For some Chinese people a comment like "you're fat" might just be their version of a conversation opener as they can't think of anything else to say. I just ignore the comment.
usually I say....if compared to chopsticks im fat, i know...thanks.
