I think that the experience of living abroad have always made me more confident on myself. Things that would seem difficult to achieve when I was back home feel like a small inconvenience after 6 years abroad.

I'm sure that lot of your friends panic at the idea of moving to China, and you have already taken a step that most people don't have the confidence to take.

Living abroad it is not easy, and most people feel overwhelmed by the change at some point, specially if they don't have a strong reason for staying there or a promising career/relationship. 

But I think that you have to differentiate between the confidence in yourself (which you should have, because what you are doing is not easy task) and the confidence in your decision to come to China, which could be right or wrong, and which you might have to rethink depending on your goals and your possibilities. 

  It's made me more or less confident that if I go home to my old job lifting boxes for ten hours a day i'm gonna really regret it.

No matter how you feel about where you are now, you can be sure that you will be a stronger and wiser person than if you had just stayed home. For me it was at first a career-wise dead end, moving directly away from what I wanted to do, this at the cost of trying to live in China for me. My motivation for doing this is that I met my Chinese wife back home, and for me to be with her, trying to live in China, getting to know her relatives, culture etc. is a must, so I do not see this as a sacrifice. 

Career is somewhat back on track now in a way that I am hoping to keep the option of either staying in China or going back home open. (if only I could find a job that would give me freedom to be in both places half of the time) 

My boss in a past job said to me that in terms of career, exposure to different cultures, the business environment there, etc. will always be good to have on the CV. This is of course said in the context that I would remain in the same industry. We were working in a company doing business globally. 

If you have friends in the expat community near you, then some might be loose friendships, some could be friends for life. The expat life is not very stable so people come and go. Some of your Chinese friends will be using you as a free English lesson. I have found that most of my wifes friends are unimpressed with the fact that I am not Chinese, they might see me as strange in a lot of ways, but I think we are seeing each other eye to eye for the most part. 

As for the snotty kids in expensive cars, they are everywhere on the planet. Although I would like an exotic car, I remember they have paid a higher price for it than I would ever do, they (or their families) have sold out to corruption (yes yes yes, generalization alert, of course some have earned their money honestly) 

Living in China has made me and many of my friends less confident. I wish it was simply a matter of relationships or feeling less than a second generation youngster in an expensive car. We are less confident because of the constant racism we have to face from the classroom to the streets and then there is work...if we can even get one. They read our qualifications and love them, then they find out we're not "white" and turn us down. It's hurtful and insulting. The few open minded ones tell us not to worry but how would they know how it feels to walk down the streets and have little kids shout things at you that their parents taught them.

Where I'm from we have plenty of Asians. They are more than welcomed in society: they work , study and play with us. I thought I would get the same level of respect here. 

Could I ever have been more wrong.

7 months in and confidence in my person (self-esteem, character traits) and my decision to come to China are both at an all time high, mostly from seeing the way many people act here. I feel I must be doing something right to be scoffed at by the undeservedly rich.

Hmmmm, I've been through the whole cycle - overwhelmed newbie, foreigner centre of attention, deeply unhappy, finding equanimity, disillusionment and leaving - in a very short period of time.

Looking back at my time there;

have I hurt my career by coming here? Well, for me, I left the original career I had, the one I my bachelors degree related to, and I am happy with that decision. China neither hurt nor hindered any career, as I am saving to go back to university to do my masters. My career will start when I eventually scrape that money together.

Is living in China worth leaving my family and friends behind for? Sure, my family want me to travel and see the world. Real friends will always be there - the people you drift away from by being overseas are really not worth staying home for.

Am I killing myself by living in this polluted country? Yes. Simple.

 Have I made any lasting friendships here? A couple. Well, time will tell just how lasting they are.

Are people interested in me for me or because I'm a foreigner? The latter, most of them. Sorry.

Would I be happier back home? For me, this is the most interesting question. I can say that I was deeply unhappy during the Chinese winter, a time of intense isolation. I got happier the longer I stayed there, for my partner it was different - the longer he stayed in China the more sickened he became with the culture and the more unhappy he became.

Now we live in my country and I'm very, very restless. I want to travel. I would be happier in SE Asia than China or home. Going home can be a very, very difficult thing indeed. I