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Q: You know you're in China when...
I'll start;
You know you're in China when...
...the toilets are knee deep in piss and the cleaner is standing right next to you.
...a mother gets out of her Porsche to let her kid shit on the pavement.
...you're trying to relax at home and you hear people spitting in the corridor.
...no matter if you were the first in the queue, you will still be the last person to get on that bus.
Any more?
......When your hotdog order was taken quite literally.
..... When the hottest girl the club has hairier armpits than you.
...... When your neighbor in the million dollar house with the million dollar car washes his feet in a bucket every night to save on the water bill.
.... When someone says " Thank you" your very first thought is to try and guess what country they come from.
--People laugh and talk to each other about how they are going to steal from you while you are standing right in front of them. When you let it slip that you speak Chinese, they immediately act like they are your buddy.
--People become angry and defensive over any perceived slight of Mother China and her Glorious People...but whenever they go abroad, they spit, pee, poop, litter, yell, steal, nickel and dime, and treat local staff like garbage.
--You fail a student who came to less than 1/2 of her classes. She sends you an e-mail appealing the grade. It begins by apologizing for her bad attitude towards your class. She was just angry that the university required her to take it because she hates English. She has the nerve to close it with the line, 'as you know, grades are very important to Chinese students!'
